I'm here peeps. I fell off the wagon for a couple of days but I'm back.
Negative highlights of the weekend: I had ice cream (twice) and ate at the Texas Roadhouse last night for dinner.
Positive highlights: I did my third level one shred workout yesterday before I left town. I did bring healthy snacks for the zoo trip yesterday and actually ate them. I brought water to drink and ate some carrots and light string cheese. Last night, I only ate half my baked potato and half of my burger and boxed up the rest.
I'm bummed (actually downright depressed) over the fact that I gained .3 lbs. at Friday's weigh-in but know that I was at fault for that and I'm the one who has control over my weight. I also know that I still have a LONG road ahead of me and that I refuse to give up! (no matter how much I self-sabotage or fall off the wagon)
I am done being the fat girl. I am done shopping in plus sized clothing sections. I am done feeling like shit from the time I wake up until I go to bed. I'm tired of my 11-year old son being embarrassed to be seen in public with me and of him having his own issues (i.e. being afraid to get fat). I am tired of being the "fat" friend to all of my gorgeous, thin, healthy friends. I hate the fact that my husband weighs less than me now. I hate the fact that I feel like I have no self-control. I hate it when people make losing weight look so easy when it's the hardest thing I've ever done. I hate the fact that I eat to stuff my emotions down and so I won't feel.
That felt good.
Hope everyone had a happy Mother's Day. Mine was pretty crappy. We weren't home for half the day because of this zoo/family outing (my own doing). The kids fought on the way home. Matt is grumpy as hell because the effing Chantix isn't working (to keep his irritability in check - and probably because he's tired from doing for everyone else, us included, and not doing anything for himself and being able to get anything done around the house). I was so EXHAUSTED that I slept almost the whole way home and then fell asleep on and off for about two hours while I was trying to do homework. I finally got through 2/3 of my homework and had to go shopping since we had very little food in the house for breakfast and lunch this week.
I did pick myself up some gifts for mothers' day though...some chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream and a bottle of SlimQuick. I ate one bowl of ice cream, which I shared with Collin. The boys get the rest of it this week. I will NOT eat anymore...that I can promise you! I am not a big pill fan but I have got to get this nighttime hunger in check; it is part of what is sabotaging this weight loss.
Some things I am doing differently this week are:
1) Eating a Jimmy Dean D-Lights breakfast sandwich with fruit for breakfast. I've got the turkey sausage and then the Canadian bacon varieties. I am interested to see if this helps with the hunger.
2) No more apple and peanut butter. Instead, it will be an apple with a light string cheese or fat free yogurt and maybe even a veggie.
3) Get to bed earlier (except for tonight since I was up late doing homework) and get 7.5 hours of sleep. I have heard that if you don't get enough sleep that that can hinder your weight loss. That's probably another reason why I feel like shit all the time, despite my consistent working out.
4) Starting SlimQuick. I know what you're thinking since I absolutely hate taking pills and am really against people taking pills to lose weight. I'm at my wits end and I'm just about willing to try anything right now that will help out with this hunger! I promise if I start feeling funny or anything I will stop taking them. I will also keep you posted on how they work.
5) More water!!! Perhaps this is most important. I am going to shoot for at least 80 oz a day but optimally, I would like to get in 120 oz. per day.
Here are a couple of pics from our outing yesterday...I have many more but don't have them uploaded to my laptop so I had to steal them from Matt's Facebook...
Negative highlights of the weekend: I had ice cream (twice) and ate at the Texas Roadhouse last night for dinner.
Positive highlights: I did my third level one shred workout yesterday before I left town. I did bring healthy snacks for the zoo trip yesterday and actually ate them. I brought water to drink and ate some carrots and light string cheese. Last night, I only ate half my baked potato and half of my burger and boxed up the rest.
I'm bummed (actually downright depressed) over the fact that I gained .3 lbs. at Friday's weigh-in but know that I was at fault for that and I'm the one who has control over my weight. I also know that I still have a LONG road ahead of me and that I refuse to give up! (no matter how much I self-sabotage or fall off the wagon)
I am done being the fat girl. I am done shopping in plus sized clothing sections. I am done feeling like shit from the time I wake up until I go to bed. I'm tired of my 11-year old son being embarrassed to be seen in public with me and of him having his own issues (i.e. being afraid to get fat). I am tired of being the "fat" friend to all of my gorgeous, thin, healthy friends. I hate the fact that my husband weighs less than me now. I hate the fact that I feel like I have no self-control. I hate it when people make losing weight look so easy when it's the hardest thing I've ever done. I hate the fact that I eat to stuff my emotions down and so I won't feel.
That felt good.
Hope everyone had a happy Mother's Day. Mine was pretty crappy. We weren't home for half the day because of this zoo/family outing (my own doing). The kids fought on the way home. Matt is grumpy as hell because the effing Chantix isn't working (to keep his irritability in check - and probably because he's tired from doing for everyone else, us included, and not doing anything for himself and being able to get anything done around the house). I was so EXHAUSTED that I slept almost the whole way home and then fell asleep on and off for about two hours while I was trying to do homework. I finally got through 2/3 of my homework and had to go shopping since we had very little food in the house for breakfast and lunch this week.
I did pick myself up some gifts for mothers' day though...some chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream and a bottle of SlimQuick. I ate one bowl of ice cream, which I shared with Collin. The boys get the rest of it this week. I will NOT eat anymore...that I can promise you! I am not a big pill fan but I have got to get this nighttime hunger in check; it is part of what is sabotaging this weight loss.
Some things I am doing differently this week are:
1) Eating a Jimmy Dean D-Lights breakfast sandwich with fruit for breakfast. I've got the turkey sausage and then the Canadian bacon varieties. I am interested to see if this helps with the hunger.
2) No more apple and peanut butter. Instead, it will be an apple with a light string cheese or fat free yogurt and maybe even a veggie.
3) Get to bed earlier (except for tonight since I was up late doing homework) and get 7.5 hours of sleep. I have heard that if you don't get enough sleep that that can hinder your weight loss. That's probably another reason why I feel like shit all the time, despite my consistent working out.
4) Starting SlimQuick. I know what you're thinking since I absolutely hate taking pills and am really against people taking pills to lose weight. I'm at my wits end and I'm just about willing to try anything right now that will help out with this hunger! I promise if I start feeling funny or anything I will stop taking them. I will also keep you posted on how they work.
5) More water!!! Perhaps this is most important. I am going to shoot for at least 80 oz a day but optimally, I would like to get in 120 oz. per day.
Here are a couple of pics from our outing yesterday...I have many more but don't have them uploaded to my laptop so I had to steal them from Matt's Facebook...
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