This was the biggest thing I forgot to mention to you all about Monday.
I believe that my friend Becky already practices this way of thinking while eating, from reading her blog. It's really a great concept.
The majority of people that read my blog are busy mothers. So...we are great at multi-tasking. How many times do we eat while reading, on the computer, or in the car??? When we do that, we are mindlessly eating. My therapist suggested being mindful of what you are eating, how much you are eating, how you are feeling as you eat and that you stop when you feel satisfied and full, but not gorged. She also suggested that I eat slowly and enjoy the food.
I think the biggest thing that will help me in this respect is eating at the dinner table. What a concept??? I eat often in front of the T.V. or while doing my homework or on the computer and so I don't think about what I'm eating, how I'm feeling, etc. I firmly believe that this will help. I'm not saying that I won't eat while on the computer or while reading any more; I'm just going to try to bring along a healthy portion of what it is I'm eating and stick to that instead of eating out of a whole bag of something.
The added bonus...I get to re-connect with Matt and the boys and it will bring us a little bit closer together as a family.
For me, this weight loss journey and journey to self-discovery and awareness is about getting back to the basics and focusing on what is important to me in the long-run which is my health and my family.
And on a positive note, I didn't snack at all after my blog post last night and I've stayed under my carb limit I've set for myself the past two days. Yesterday I was actually under 1500 calories for the day and I even did HIIT on the elliptical. I'm finally getting to the point where I'm not starving! Yippee!
Showing posts with label therapy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label therapy. Show all posts
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
Therapy update
I had my second session yesterday and it was unbelievably therapeutic.
There were a couple of things I wanted to share that I thought you might be interested in.
We discussed my binge eating (I am so ashamed of those two words but the truth hurts). Sugar is my downfall, which she explained to me is very common with binge eaters. She explained to me that when the first bite of a sugar-laden food is consumed that the majority of the pleasure centers in the brain light up. The second bite lights up less and then the third bite barely lights up any. By the time you get to the fourth bite, little to none of the pleasure centers light up. So, in theory (according to her), if you have a craving you should have one to three bites, put it down and if you still want it 20 minutes later, then have another bite or two and so on until you are satisfied. She thinks that if I try this that I won't want any more after the first three bites.
I have yet to try this because I'm eating low carb and sugar is not conducive to this lifestyle. If I get in a pinch, I'll try this and let you know what I think.
She also doesn't think I should low-carb 'diet' either. I explained to her that I'm well aware that whatever I decide to do that it has to be a lifestyle change and not a diet. The problem is that I am sooooo hungry on any other 'diet' that it sends me into crazy binging sprees...not a good thing at all. So...unbeknownst to her, I'm going to keep low-carbing until I've made a valiant effort and can't lose any more weight. I'm hoping that I won't have to do that but we'll see.
The other thing she suggested is basically savoring food one time by myself. I'm supposed to look at it, smell it, feel the weight of it on my fork, savor the flavor while eating it...you get the point. I have yet to do this too because I never have time alone to do this and there's no way in hell that I'm doing that in front of Matt or the boys...they'd really think that I lost it then! LOL
Lastly, she wants me to start working on this workbook:
There were a couple of things I wanted to share that I thought you might be interested in.
We discussed my binge eating (I am so ashamed of those two words but the truth hurts). Sugar is my downfall, which she explained to me is very common with binge eaters. She explained to me that when the first bite of a sugar-laden food is consumed that the majority of the pleasure centers in the brain light up. The second bite lights up less and then the third bite barely lights up any. By the time you get to the fourth bite, little to none of the pleasure centers light up. So, in theory (according to her), if you have a craving you should have one to three bites, put it down and if you still want it 20 minutes later, then have another bite or two and so on until you are satisfied. She thinks that if I try this that I won't want any more after the first three bites.
I have yet to try this because I'm eating low carb and sugar is not conducive to this lifestyle. If I get in a pinch, I'll try this and let you know what I think.
She also doesn't think I should low-carb 'diet' either. I explained to her that I'm well aware that whatever I decide to do that it has to be a lifestyle change and not a diet. The problem is that I am sooooo hungry on any other 'diet' that it sends me into crazy binging sprees...not a good thing at all. So...unbeknownst to her, I'm going to keep low-carbing until I've made a valiant effort and can't lose any more weight. I'm hoping that I won't have to do that but we'll see.
The other thing she suggested is basically savoring food one time by myself. I'm supposed to look at it, smell it, feel the weight of it on my fork, savor the flavor while eating it...you get the point. I have yet to do this too because I never have time alone to do this and there's no way in hell that I'm doing that in front of Matt or the boys...they'd really think that I lost it then! LOL
Lastly, she wants me to start working on this workbook:
I leafed through the first few pages on Amazon.com and it looks really interesting. She said that the first half of the book doesn't even deal much with sexual abuse and it looks like she's right. I ordered it off of half.com for like $8 and I can't wait to get it.
It's been since Sunday night that I ate anything really bad. This is killing me. I'm a little hungry but nothing crazy and all I want to do is go into the kitchen and eat half of the plate of cookies that my MIL baked with the boys today. Maybe I'll get a sugar-free ice cream bar or a couple of sugar-free chocolates instead...
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
I'm a wreck.
Yep...that's the conclusion I've came to (or is that come to? I dunno?)
So I saw my therapist today. I think I'm going to like her. She actually used 'dude' when we were talking. Anyone who knows me knows that I say 'dude' all the time. One point for Abby (my therapist). What a great name too?! Kind of like 'Dear Abby'. :)
Anywho, it's been so long since I've allowed myself to feel much. My life is so busy that I'm on auto-pilot most of the time and today I actually cried while talking to her. I didn't think I had it in me but, yep...I cried.
I hate crying. It's not that I feel weak or anything (because lord knows I've cried enough over my lifetime and it's a good release), I just don't like to since I feel like I don't have time to wallow in self-pity. And let's face it, it hasn't gotten some people I know very far in their life and I refuse to be that person who no one wants to be around because they just bitch and moan about their life but won't do anything about it.
We decided to focus on these issues right now and in this order: 1) my obesity / poor eating / exercise habits, 2) my dad, and 3) my sexual abuse (which #3 kind of goes hand in hand with #2 since I'm angry at my Dad since his poor decision is why it happened in the first place AND why the pervert was never brought to justice).
Here are some other things we touched on:
- the fact that I'm surrounded by people with mental illnesses...yay me!
- my parent's divorce at age 6
- my dad and step-mom's divorce after 19 years of marriage
- dad's 'alternative' life style
- my concerns for my siblings' well-being
- me not having much of a childhood
- my awesome husband and how I'm soooo blessed to have found someone as great as him!
- my hobbies: social networking (i.e. MySpace, Facebook, & BabyCenter), happy hour with my friends, and reading (wow...I'm so exciting! Or am I just a sad person? I haven't decided)
I didn't see my psychiatrist today. I don't see him for another three weeks or so. I think therapy is going to help though since I'm more interested in learning how to cope with the aforementioned and to get a handle on my emotional eating for good.
I'll keep you posted on how it goes.
So I saw my therapist today. I think I'm going to like her. She actually used 'dude' when we were talking. Anyone who knows me knows that I say 'dude' all the time. One point for Abby (my therapist). What a great name too?! Kind of like 'Dear Abby'. :)
Anywho, it's been so long since I've allowed myself to feel much. My life is so busy that I'm on auto-pilot most of the time and today I actually cried while talking to her. I didn't think I had it in me but, yep...I cried.
I hate crying. It's not that I feel weak or anything (because lord knows I've cried enough over my lifetime and it's a good release), I just don't like to since I feel like I don't have time to wallow in self-pity. And let's face it, it hasn't gotten some people I know very far in their life and I refuse to be that person who no one wants to be around because they just bitch and moan about their life but won't do anything about it.
We decided to focus on these issues right now and in this order: 1) my obesity / poor eating / exercise habits, 2) my dad, and 3) my sexual abuse (which #3 kind of goes hand in hand with #2 since I'm angry at my Dad since his poor decision is why it happened in the first place AND why the pervert was never brought to justice).
Here are some other things we touched on:
- the fact that I'm surrounded by people with mental illnesses...yay me!
- my parent's divorce at age 6
- my dad and step-mom's divorce after 19 years of marriage
- dad's 'alternative' life style
- my concerns for my siblings' well-being
- me not having much of a childhood
- my awesome husband and how I'm soooo blessed to have found someone as great as him!
- my hobbies: social networking (i.e. MySpace, Facebook, & BabyCenter), happy hour with my friends, and reading (wow...I'm so exciting! Or am I just a sad person? I haven't decided)
I didn't see my psychiatrist today. I don't see him for another three weeks or so. I think therapy is going to help though since I'm more interested in learning how to cope with the aforementioned and to get a handle on my emotional eating for good.
I'll keep you posted on how it goes.
For the record, I am uncomfortable blogging about the fact that I need a therapist and a psychiatrist to get 'better' and heal my past and I am also aware that it might make some of you uncomfortable reading this. However, I know I have some regular followers (and not so regulars) and if putting myself out there helps just one person, then I'm glad I made myself and you uncomfortable. :)
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